We all experience stress at times. And that’s ok. But when the stress becomes too much, too intense, or it goes on for too long it can get the best out of us.
We can get stressed as a result of anything. We’re all unique and different things get different people out of their comfort zone. Common causes are busy periods at work, giving a lot of oneself without receiving enough back, disagreement with a partner, the death of a loved one, illness or big changes like becoming a parent, moving home, being made redundant or starting a new job.
The way an individual copes with stress usually falls into one of these categories: increasing one’s energy and attention to fight the stress or decreasing it in order to withdraw from the situation. This results in an excessive or deficient coping strategy (Eastern Body, Western Mind by A. Judith, 1996 p.18).
Do you turn inward and hide away from the source of your stress, or do you become super-active with a never ending to-do list in an attempt to solve the issue? Both are coping strategies designed to deal with stress, but eventually they can both result in behaviour that doesn’t reach the desired outcome. Over time, it can even cause health problems, affecting sleeping patterns, mood and energy levels.
You probably know that if you’re the “excessive one” you need a rest, go to yoga or leave work early and not check your Blackberry at night. And when you are the “one that withdraws” you quite likely already are aware that postponing doesn’t work, that thinking things over and over in your head doesn’t change anything, and that you should come of the sofa and find the courage to face up to your demons.
But even though you know all the "things you should do", they don’t happen. And beating yourself up because of that makes you feel even worse. Psychologists call this ‘sabotaging ourselves’. Your inner saboteur and inner critic block your progress, and that’s where a coach can help!
Would you like some insight into the ways in which you sabotage yourself? And receive friendly support to master your inner critic to and help to reduce your stress levels? We’d be honoured to hear from you.
